Starting Over

I started this blog when I went to India with Debra for her surgeries. It was last ditch effort to find out why she was so ill. Well life has changed and I am moving on with my life and she is moving on with hers. I think that's best for both of us. So on this cold November morning I am going to take the suggestion of a friend and start over with a new blog that brings me joy and comfort. I will still use it as a prayer link but also add cooking, and menu items, photos of our fun times together with friends and things that make me happy. I am sure it will be productive and I invite you to visit, make comments and post to it your favorite recipes as well. This life is to short to live in fear of the what if I don't do this or that... guilt is of no use to anyone and we can never change the past but we can build a better new day. Today that's my goal. I didn't write in my journal last night, didn't stay up late wondering what was going to happen next, got to bed on time and I feel pretty good today. I have already gotten dressed, taken out the dogs, put on some washing and it's only 8:15 a.m. my day is off to a good start. My goal is to be up and dressed by 7:30, busy work finished by 10:00 a.m and my reading and blogging to start around this time several days a week built around that time frame. If you have a prayer request send it to me I will pray for you. If you have some fun to share like a neat place to visit or go send that as well. If you just want a phone call or need to talk I will do that just share it with me. We will never become friends standing in the lobby of the building so when we plan our next Dutch Treat Thursday be sure to put it on your calendar. We'll do some in the evenings as well to let the ladies that work have a shot at going, too. We will make arrangement to do some cooking together. Classes for the kids and the adults at the building and use our new kitchen that the Lord blessed all of us with. We will overcome the darkness and let our light shine because there is no hope in a dark dim world so let us do our best to communicate our needs become deep and solid friends and to help each other as we walk down the path they call "life" in this world. I believe with all my heart that we can be a strong force against the wrongs of this world. I have been taxed all my life with problems that overshadowed the glory of the wonderful life I have and I am at a point where I just wont buy in anymore. I have been bless beyond anything I could have ever imagined for this sad and lonely child. I had one really wonderful friend as a child and still have her today. I thank God for her because it makes me know things can last and they can be good all the days of our lives. We all need to feel like we belong and we need to know that we belong somewhere. Each body of ladies bond differently and for different reasons those with young children bond with those who have likewise lifestyles there is nothing wrong with that. Don't think there is no place for you or your problems because there doesn't seem to be a spot just for you. Make a spot. Claim your God given right to be a part of the Lord's church. Don't expect people to make a place for you tell them you have one and work it. I fear so much that people who are not strong who don't have good friendships they fall away going the wrong path not because they didn't belong but because they didn't try to belong. I for a long time felt I didn't fit in anywhere but that was my thought. Even with problem children and heartaches and hell raining down on my head sometimes... I do have a spot I just didn't claim it and make it my own. I have to tell you life didn't work out the way I wanted it and my kids didn't turn out to be the kids I wanted them to be. They choose their own paths but I was told by "the good doctor" I see for depression... Why did I think I was so special that I could run two lives? You only get ONE life and it's your life so you make it what it is, you can only make choices for yourself. We are given children to raise. When they are we are to give them to themselves and to the Lord so they can mature. Just as I myself had to do and we as mature adults make our own choices good or bad. Even though I was told how horrible I was, that I was not supportive enough I have to realize I must not be able to be supportive enough. It's not with in my measure to supply the needs of another with unlimited wants and needs. People who are takers will always be takers and giving people will always be giving. It's the nature of the game. (break, fed dogs, folded towels, made me a cup of coffee) breaks over. I have to take breaks to keep in step with my own program LOL. I have a new name for my new blog. I will start it shortly and I will not return to this one. This is the last post in this blog as a new day is dawning with fresh ideas and better more productive thoughts. I have loved my blog. It has given me a place of expression and my prayers here are always prayed in great faith. God's good and perfect will and timing will always be the path and I praise Him for the countless times he has saved me from myself. Do I have a personality disorder? I am sure I do but God says I will love you for you and I trust in what He says. I am and always will be unto His work and service and if I can help you in anyway I will try to do so. There is no perfection in this world only grace and the mercy from a King who came down from His heavenly home to be with a dying world. As we step into His pattern let us be bold enough to hear what He is really saying......I will love you for you not for who you will be or what you will become or for what you can give for you are mine you are the child of a mighty King .......Glory be to His name always and forever.

I have noticed

Seems all things start out really strong but in due time they fall off get shorter in importance and in the end just end. That is what happens most of the time. Blogging is the same. I try to keep a written report with a journal by my bedside but even that takes to much time to keep up with daily. So is it important. Yes, I need to know when I go to appointments, when I take medications, when I have things planned and the end results of those plans. I am going to start a new and try to do better at keeping track my day planner looks like something from another planet but in and of it's self it helps some but it is so chicken scratched up it's hard to make heads of tales out of it. I saw Dr. Victor M. Manon yesterday we are going to wait for 8 weeks and try again with the implants. He seems to be a very up front honest doctor. You can't just run from doctor to doctor so I told him even though the infection cased me a lot of trouble and pain he was not off the hook. He started it and he will make it right. I think I made myself very plain and I think he understood I wanted it done right. I have contacted the Medical examiners board to check him out. I had done research on him before going but I have 8 weeks to do more so I wont stop doing whats best until I find some reason that he should do it I am sticking with the original plans. Implants are no joking matter and you better have a good doctor. How can you trust these people do you know them and it's hard to get someone to say no he is not good or don't go there. Unless they have personally used them they don't know. Then what about all the times things go perfect and all is well but then there was this one time that it didn't and it caused that doctor's name to snowball into the black ball pit. It's a guessing game and very difficult to know what to do. Roland is having the same issues with his eyes. Seeing doctors upon other doctors recommendations and with him there was no time to explore if we were using someone good or bad. We had to pray put it in God's hands and run with the ball. We do that alot. It works out pretty well. I had no way of know I would have a massive infection and neither did he. I just hope in the end it works out. He gave me clindamycin for the infection 150 mg every 8 hours for about 2 weeks started it one the 16th of June. I also started taking Amphetame SLT 10 mg to help with the excessive triedness. Alprazolam .25 which is not enough to help with anything. I am going to ask him to up it to 1 MG. I take Propoxyphne-N APAP 100MG for pain that's generic Darvocet. All the others make me itch. I really can't take anything with morphin in it that is really bad. I am taking a B-complex, Adrenal vitamins, probotics, Advil and remember I AM the person who hates having to take any kind of pill. This all started in June around fathers day with my vacation so to speak to New Mexico. Thanks to a wedding I had promised to do some of the set up on I returned quickly, started medications and have tried to go on with my life and make it a better place to be. So far so good. Who knew I would have to give in to taking medications so I just didn't go nuts. At least I don't feel like I am walking on egg shells all the time. It's a new starting point but at least you can have a new starting point and that's always a good thing.

It's been a while

I used to blog my prayers. Then I stopped blogging all together. Then I started writing them in notebooks I couldn't ever find when I wanted them but over these past months my life makes Hurricane Ike seem likes childs play. Who could even start to remember what happened why it happened and all the details. That's why blogging is important even if it is time consuming and the spell checker sucks. I went in on Wed. June 2nd to have my dental implant surgery. Paid thousands of dollars and still don't have the implants but the base work is done. Painful oh yes! My jaw is the size of a baseball. I look like somebody really worked me over and I thank God I was under full sedation when all of this went on. Not like the horrible ordeal that Roland faced with his eye surgery..... eyes wide open please! It's normal to swell and bleed, I was just told that on the phone. Who knew?? I am giving it a week to see if the swelling goes down. Don't read things on the enternet when your ill you will find the most drastic stories known to mankind. Which before your surgery you didn't read them only the ones that say what a great choice it is. I still have faith in my choices for a doctor but sure seems like a lot of over kill for some teeth to be replaced. Don't loose your bones they are hard to find again!!! Most older people have a lot of bone gone already and if you have implants it just goes with the deal. I have spent the last couple of days in bed. I am working, reading and watching Netflix to keep me sane. Blogging as well works to give you something to do while you heal. Roland is cooking me a mashed potatoe dinner. I thank God for him and his help, it will be nothing but soft foods for several months. I have a free standing tooth I have to be very careful with because I don't want it to tilt or be damaged in anyway. I love the way doctors tell you things. They come in and say honey we are going to start now don't be worried. You know that's the first sign waking up will not be a great exerience for you. I know these things heal in due time but come on 6 months from now I get to do this all again?? What joy my life has in it! I can't even think about doing the top teeth. Massive swelling I will look like Sponge Bob. Now I know why woman alway go for breast implants before they do anything else. They need to see something positive before they go in for more pain! Healing has not been this hard before a couple of hard days then it's on ward and up ward but this isn't the same deal at all. 6 months of be careful, be on gaurd work to know that they are doing the best things for you. Be happy you will be pleased later. Doesn't that sound a little funny! Oh well what is a rant without a story line. I wished I had of blogged Roland's eye surgery that would have made for a good history line later. He will need to always keep up with that information for the future and for medical matters. I have started taking some pills to help me calm down a bit seems I have stress in my life. Roland is talking about rebooking Hawaii again for next April. I think by then I might be able to see some day light. LOL Anyway I am off to do e-mail....Dear Lord be with us all for the days get harder the nights get longer and it never seems to end but in You we have hope so no matter what this life throughs at us with your guide we will be ready. I love you Lord. Even a prisoner can dream!

So much temptation so little time!

Dear Lord My Father My God

Father your child is on her knees today. Thanking You for wisedom and kindness. You alone know the workings of my heart and You alone are my shield against my own foolishness. I trust in You fully to lead me and I listen for the signs You send. Father You know the fight that is in me and the battles I face daily and I thank You for rest in prayer because it feels more like mad panic than peace. Work with me while I battle the world to know my own place here. I know that it seems that I should move forward but doing so always hurts somebody. You leave someone behind you find another place to be you walk slower and don't know the path to take. It's a burden to my heart Father to not really know or understand what You want me to do. I am asking straight away for wisedom and help only You can give me peace in knowing which direction I should take. Worry is not going to make things change>ONLY YOU CAN DO THAT> HELP ME Father to walk in Your light and Your will do not let me make a mistake that can't be changed once the choices are made. Life seems to change daily for me and I have no idea where I am going. Look at Your child Father I know I am not the only one in this sea of pain. So many need You but I cry out for myself today because without direction from You I will make the wrong choices. I prayed and I hope I am hearing from You and not myself. I see the direction but I am scared of the results. I need some peace. Is this all there is for me or is there more? I look and I see that it just doesn't seem right my thoughts are racing but are they going in the right direction? Why are there dreams if there are no answers. How long does one have to pray before the answers come that give relief? Each day has it's own troubles but Lord Your hand upon any problem can solve it. I need courage to speak my mind this is not the time to be shy about what I really want and this is not the time to be weak. Is there hope Father? Is there any real answer or do we just limp along and wonder? Father you can give it all to us and I know I have felt your presence in my dealings. I fear it to know I might not be doing what Your will is for me because I am confused. Make it clear Father. Watch over me while I act and do not let me do anything that would be displeasing to You. I do feel like Eve in the Garden looking longingly at the Tree and just wondering what should I do? Father I have a lot of fear because I know myself all to well. The words come to mind "to thine own self be true" If I am true to myself it will hurt others, I am not sure I am ready to do that to people I love and respect to have my own way. Help me Father so I do not fall into the evil paths of this world. Desire is a horrible thing when it calls to you day and night. Help me know Father what is best. Help me know how to control it.

Father, be with my list. Be with Mark Goode while he is home with his family. Give them much joy while together. Keep Alma safe and whole. Be with my Debra and Lord an extra portion for the love of My life Roland. Hold us all in Your hand and near to You Father for it is in the sacrifices of Your son we pray all things. Amen

There is a life worth living

Dear Father
While on this earth I will seek Your glory in everything, every event, every test, every detail of my life belongs to You. I needed to take some time tonight to offer a prayer for the blesses on Roland's eye. It's been scary dealing with all of this I had just expected everything to go like clock work but it didn't. He had to be very compliant to the doctors order, he had to do everything just as they would have it done. He really had to be totally devoted to getting better. As prayers were offered he did get better and even if we are still working on his healing we know You blessed us with help, with friendships and with courage to do what he had to do. It wasn't easy having a lazer shot repeatedly into his eye but by doing it healing will come. Thank You Father for putting us with a doctor who worked over time to get him in and stayed till it was done. Our doctor has been such a blessing she has been light hearted and made it easier to deal with the whole situation. Continue to bless her and make her able to be a healer.

Just wanted to let it be said how good our God is and how our lives are touched everyday if we just open our eyes and see it. Father, I have been watching some movies that are just breaking my heart. I hate that these are being made. I hope that You know that when I watch such things it's such a sad event. It makes the words Forgive them Father for they know not what they do ring in my ears. I hope You will forgive us. Your glory will show threw this messy life and when the day comes for us to know the truth it's going to be there for us and for that I am grateful. It is all going to be worth the wait and the fight to have the life that is in You not only in the days to come but in our everyday lives right now. Guide the heart of the men in leadership to give us a path to walk that will bring us home to You. Be with the one who are in charge of making choices so they make the right ones that affect Your people. Never forget us Father for there are those who will seek You and Your will no matter what the world says. I am one of those people because I believe in You and I believe in Your words. I asked that You be with my list of loved ones, the elderly those who need You daily. Keep us whole and focused in all the things that we are dealing with.

I pray it all at the feet of Jesus until the day You come or call me home. Let the light of Your love for us shine because we can see it Father when we look.....Amen

Thank You for a Blessed Day

Dear Father

Thank You for a blessed day we were able to enjoy our home and our safety here. Roland had a place to relax and recover. Be with him during this time of healing and watch over his needs. Thank You for helping us be in the right place at the right time and getting to the doctor in a timely manner where nothing went wrong and he didn’t loose his eye sight. Lord there are many things that can go wrong but when we walk with you we are as safe as we can be in this world and I am very grateful for that. Lord just hold our hands, give us faith in You and knowledge about what course of action is best. Work with our hearts and minds to keep them in focus with what You would want for Your needs and ours to be met.

Father be with Lois Allen and all those who are older that have pain and struggles. Hold tight to the promise You gave and be with them in these difficult time. Be with those who have cancer and no real answers to help them. Watch after those who just are not sure what to do with their lives. Many misgivings keep us from getting a good hold on this life and our work in it. Be with the young men and women that will face even tougher times. Help our leaders of this country to do what is right so people have jobs and educational choices that will keep this country strong. Be with the leaders of the churches to help them guide so Your will is seen. Forgive those who use Your name for their own gain. Forgive our sins and forgive when we take advantage of situations that shouldn’t happen. Forgive the lies that are told to make our lives look like something they are not. Let me always have a repentant heart and be long suffering when I am tested by the world. We have so much and it’s easy to get off track and I thank You Lord because Your word can and does bring each and everyone who loves You back into Your light. Help us all to cling to that. Let us forgive things that hurt us words that wound us let our hearts know those things will and can heal. Forgive anything that holds us from the work You have for us.

Be with new relationships, new choices and facing things that are different. Give an open heart so that I can be accepting and willing to work with those who are new coming into my life. Lord, You better than any one knows that I don’t like new people. I don’t trust well, I don’t deal well with people. I would rather get a new puppy than have to deal with a child. I know that’s wrong Father and I know I need to try harder to work with young people. Bless my life with comfort and security as I deal with new people in my life.

We are very blessed Father that the medications Debra is taking seems to have worked quickly to help some of her problems already. We are also blessed that this medication wont change the sleep study she is due to take. We need answers and I think we are getting there so Thank You Father for keeping me steady and strong to deal with these matters and Thank You for blessing her life with some healing hope. It might not be the total answer but it’s a start and we are grateful for it.

In the name of our Lord I pray it all into Your hands. You give us hope and happiness and it’s Your will in which I turn over all things….Amen.

Emergency Surgery

Dear Lord and Father

The road to heaven might be hard at times, but Jesus said in My Fathers house are many glorious dwelling places, and when we get there it will be wonderful. Rev 21:4-5 “And God will wipe away every tear from their (our) eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away. Then He who sat on the throne said, "Behold, I make all things new." And He said to me (John), "Write, for these words are true and faithful." There are some things just worth the trip. Glory!!!!!!!!!!!

Lord, each day I always try to start our with something from Your word, it blesses my life and keeps me keen on knowing who You are to me. I want to thank You with the deepest core that is in me for all of the things that just timed out perfectly yesterday. I want to thank You that Roland’s emergency surgery went well and even with the pain he got through it without losing his eye sight. You placed me at the right spot and with the right person to make things flow and we got Roland to the clinic in time to save his eye. Thank You, Father, for taking care of us and letting things turn out to be in our blessed favor. I want to thank You Father for Karen who was with me and could just pick up the ball and run with it getting my truck home safely and I thank You Father for a friend I can trust to just be there. Not everybody can you just toss the keys to and feel good about it. Thank You, Father, for all the blessings that are in having a Christian family that will help you in time of need. Father, yesterday we also got some medications for Debra that may be a start to helping her with her problems the doctor really seems to understand our needs and faces our problems directly and talks straight forwardly to Debra. He advised her to take 30 minutes and to turn all things that cause distraction off and to pray. I think that’s some good counsel she hasn’t really gotten before from the doctors so Father, bless her with the tenderness to understand the power that is in prayer.

Father, I want to bring to Your attention the lives of those in our military, our leadership, our countries leaders. We are fighting a battle that we have never faced before. The changes are coming fast to our way of life and Father we need Your hand on all matters that concern this country that was built on Christian values. Help us stay a Christian nation; help us all to respect the gifts of being a Christian nation. Help the leadership in our churches to guide us in the right direction. Help those who are elders of the church to guide and protect the values You designed and help them to be providers of Your words. Help us as a church to not hinder the work that these men must do. Lift them up Father and make them convicted to the cause they have dedicated themselves to and let them not grow faint and weary in the matters that concern the church and its growth.

Father, there are many I call to Your relief in matters of health, finance, faith You know them and the list is long so be with them Father, Mark Goode, Roland, Debra, Darla, Amber, Michael, David, Kim, Bo, Shirley, Harold, Linda, Mike, Liz, Bill, Jane, Robbie, Sandy, Sonny, Sandra, Nell, Peggy, Lexi, Glen, Stephen, and all that need and have needs Father just walk with Your children and keep us safe as these times show us that heartaches come and we must look to You for our sanity and our salvation while we wait for whatever may come in this life. Bless our efforts to stay in Your will and Your ways. Forgive us of our sins and let us always have a repentant heart when we don’t do as we should. Keep our lives focused on You and not on the world.

In the blessed name of our Lord Jesus Christ I lay all these burdens at Your feet. I know that You restore the brokenness of this life and until the day comes I will worship and pray for it is in the name of Jesus that all things will be made right. Amen

Just a short prayer

Dear Father

There are a lot of things to be thankful for today like the computer working when the weather is so cold outside. I have never enjoyed even a little cold weather it’s not my cup of tea that’s for sure. I am thankful that I can be indoors doing something constructive until I can get back to doing some much needed yard work. Just wanted to take some time with You Father to pray for our nation. Praying for our leaders and those who’s voice rule this world. I feel a deep sadness for our country as things are taking place that I know You will not honor. Our values Father are being trampled, our savings are going out the window and our trust in just about anything is being trampled. I am just putting faith in You as You have told us to endure all things. I have been spending a lot of study in the book of Revelations and I must tell You I am fearful for our children, for our young adults and the older people who face illness and suffering. I am frightened for all people right now because I can read these words and they are prophecy… other things have happened but it has never been what was written in the bible to happen. I just asked Father that you be with us and protect Your children from whatever happens in this life. Let us walk the valley of death with a calmness in us that only comes from YOU.

Father this wont be a long prayer today as my headaches have returned so be with the list that stays on my heart always, be with my family, be with Alma McCaghren today. Hold all of us in Your victory until You come or call us home let our hearts and mind be with You. "My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness." (2 Cor 12:9) Amen

Monday Morning Prayers.....

Dear Sovereign Lord

Our prayers are going out daily to You for all the love that is shown in the walk we face in our daily lives. I want to thank you Lord for blessed days on Sat and Sunday of this week. I want to give you praise and glory for the wisdom You have implanted in the hearts of young men like Lans Martin who Father is taking his voice out on the road from church to church to share with others the power of Your saving grace. Leading the lost to springs of living water in Your name for Your ability to save us from ourselves, bless the efforts Father and let it continue to do good in the lives of those who expose themselves to it.

Father, each day I want to extend to you praise for the glory and wisdom You share with Your children. Thank you for patient endurance that makes all things possible. Your kindness rains down from heaven and we are so blessed to have it fall upon us. Father, future generations will be told about the Lamb and the King and the ways You can wipe away the tears from their eyes and it’s never going to change so thank you because it will strengthen what remains. I pray Father to be in and with those of the fifth seal. I always wonder how long Sovereign Lord until You judge the people of this earth but I know there is a plan in place so I give those thoughts over to You with power and strength to God for Your will must always be honored no matter what my eyes might see or my mind might think.

Father, hold the hand of Lois Allen keep her safe and calm as she faces hospital care and problems with her heart. Renee Ballard has been blessed with a return to work after some illness thank you for her recovery. Nell Cooke is facing a battle with cancer it seems to have taken its hold on this family Father so let her be strong in her walk as she faces this illness. Give her and Don strength and endurance. Watch over Alma McCaghren and just met her every need Father because she is dear to all of us and we want so much for her to have comfort and peace in this season of her life. Be with Pam Wagnon as she laid her mother Flossie Fritsch to rest, with Robert and Merle as they give her comfort. Father, bless the birth from Erica Rodriquez in her new son Emanuel. Father, I ask a blessing on Roland, Debra and Robbie for we are working toward goals that seems impossible to reach hold us up Father and make a way for us to find the right things to do in our home.
Father, also be with the joyful moments as there are birthdays this week, Marianna Hammel, Bo and Shirley Cox, Pam Wagnon, Stephen Fall, let them have a wonderful experience in celebrating life.

Father, Our Lord be with our eldership as they lead our church to the forefront of service to You and to others that are in need. Be with Peggy and Glen and with Lexi. Keep them safe in the storms of life. Give comfort as only you can and some understanding as to why things happen as they do.

There is a day dawning Father and it is in Your hand to guide us to deliverance from the evil things in this world. Prepared for us is a place so keep Your children whole until the day of reckoning comes. For daily prayers are said in the name of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Power and Strength be to our God for ever and ever. Amen.

Aggie's For Christ Week-End Happenings....

Dear Father, Master, King

Today our church host a special event “Aggie’s for Christ” it starts with a men’s prayer breakfast to call on You for blessing of the day. A lunch is served and a devo with a skit is planned for tonight. Father much work goes into events of this nature so as to honor You and Your place in our lives so bless the efforts of those involved and give us a good turn out for this event. Keep all safe who are working and let good ideas arise from the basic use of this tool to touch Your people.

I got an e-mail this morning Father and it had these words in it so I copied them because I thought for this day it would be a blessing to ask these things in Christ name for our church, our elders and our people. Prayer is perceived sometimes in odd ways but Lord honor these words and help us to understand the need for us to pray for family and friends.


“May today be all you need it to be. May the peace of God and the freshness of the Holy Spirit rest in your thoughts, rule in your dreams at night, and conquer all your fears. May God manifest himself today in ways you have never experienced. May your joys be fulfilled, your dreams be closer, and your prayers be answered. I pray that faith enters a new height for you; I pray that your territory is enlarged and that you have all the blessing of this life. I pray for peace, healing, health, happiness, prosperity, joy, true and undying love for God.”

Father that’s a prayer I would like to extend to my friends and to my family everyday. It would be so peaceful and calming to know that each day those things were prayed into Your hands and Your will. All of the inventory of names could share in that prayer that comes to You today on bended knees because we know in You there is hope. It will directly affect someone today to know they were prayed for and it will help to clean up some of the messes of this life. Keep us busy with the long-term clean up measures. We as Your body have a lot of work to do let us not grow weary in the efforts. Keep us full of the rewards that are in this work now so that the rewards later will make it worth every moment it took. Breath the Holy Spirit into us today and make it known that we belong to You. Show us the way Father and do not let harm come to Your children.

Father, be with the hammered communities in Haiti, those who stand bare in the streets with nothing hold them up. Send help to them Father and give relief quickly to those that are in great need. There is a tragic environmental image being seen here Father and Your help is needed to calm this collective natural disaster. What happens sometimes is sinister, streets are littered with the dead the only word is heartbreaking as we can on watch the coverage on television. Rescue, heal and be with those who mourn and hurt and those that are helping during this tragic earthquake. Father, when anything like this happens there are always ripple effects so touch people hearts and let them not do harm to each other in the name of desperation and fear. Be with the governments that are in charge to make sure that things are done that will be a blessing to that area. Give men who have power a clear mind to act quickly and rightly in all matters of concern.
Father, also be with our country and our leadership. Governing bodies don’t always make the right choices but there is a reason for them to be in place that is under Your will and under Your control. What should be will be and there is no stopping a plan already put into place so we honor that and keep working for the good of those who love God. Help us be proactive Father in making sure we do what we can. Help us to help You in all matters. Let us be Your voice, don’t make us to meek in speaking out if it’s Your will. Give us knowledge and power to be strong in the face of defeated values. Keep us all whole and intact as we go about our daily lives. Stock markets may take all our savings and illness take our health so we hold true to the one thing that mankind and life can not take away and that is our hope in the blood of Christ and in our coming salvation. Let our hearts be still and know that God is still God and that will never change.

Father, I pray it to You daily for the answers of this life, for the consoling spirit that I need to go about my day. Hope for my family and hope for the church, Your body here. Let it all go to the feet of Jesus let Him work daily to be our focus and cross. Let us pick it up and do whatever is needed for it is in His name that it is prayed. Forever more. Amen.

Early Morning Prayers

Dear Father

I woke up early this morning with thoughts of prayer on my mind the minute I woke, I was grateful for clean water and a freshly brewed cup of coffee. For a husband that was leaving to go to work to support this family I was deeply grateful. I was thankful for the sounds of a heater clicking on and off. I was comforted by the protection of the walls of my home around me. Seems this morning was filled with some pretty simple things but then I realized not so simple, clean dishes, sheets on the bed, a few dollars in my wallet. No not simple things at all really. I am grateful for the everyday life I have Lord and I thank you for being the focus of that simple but not so simple life. I think today about all of those who don’t have even the basics of life’s needs. It is a hollow feeling to know that some while we have our comforts are in desolation while we have an abundance. When I flip on the TV the footage is surreal it’s not a broadcast from another planet and the images are graphic. The new reports are so cold in the matter of fact accounts they give. Father, they don’t spare us the graphic details or the gore. Somber voiced reporter just tell it like it is without the intensity that must truly be there. Father, be with those people that are out there in the world, I can’t even think about what it must be like. I am sure many have had this experience but Father I have been blessed and have not so I listen and pray for relief as Your love has blessed my life with.

Father, many changes are coming and choices are being made daily that will affect this coming year. Let us confidently ask that Your will be involved in all of those choices. From our own family to our churches family let us be mindful that a day is coming that we will need every drop of faith we can have to be devoted to You. We are going to walk in a time when calling upon You is our hope and our only hope. We can read it in Your word and know that it’s coming. Your bible Your inspired word tells us be ready to hold strong so help us to do that with Your ever mindful watch over Your children. Keep us whole in all of our dealing and our daily walk with You. Let us be focused on You. We can see the fear building Father, so calm us and make these days come as Your word says they will but let us all who love You be with You as it does come to pass. Be with the leadership of our church, be with the men that serve You and give their lives to You. They draw a stronger account Father so help them on this earth to be the men You would have them to be. Keep us all in prayer for these men and their wives. Keep the task they deal with under Your control and let us honor Your choices in all matters of faith.

Forgive Father when things fall short, when there isn’t enough, when the work just doesn’t get done. Forgive the shortfalls I have. Forgive the days when the prayers don’t come. Forgive when repentance doesn’t seem necessary. Forgive when things seem to keep coming up short. I try Father but I know that I lack the skills to do what I should. I lack the ability to stay on task like I should. There is so much more I could do but the body is weak and the mind soft in willingness to do it. Can You forgive me Father for being such a very weak vessel. I pray that You will keep me in Your training for I know Father I have a long way to go. I should be seeking more help with these matters I am not skilled in and I should be more on task seeing things get done so be with me Father and help me, provide knowledge, provide help, provide the right contacts to make the right choices. Only in You is there a way to do these things and do them right. I ask daily for Your help in all things that concern my life and those that I deal with daily. Be with my family Father as they have to put up with me as well. Forgive my slow learning Father and guide me to a better way.

Father, there are people who need You to touch them today. The people at our church the ones who have doubts. The ones who have health problems, money problems, family problems look on them today and spare the heartaches they are having. Give them relief from the burdens of worry. Walk with them and remind them that in You all things come to the good of those that work for the Lord. Lay it upon all of our hearts when we worry about the things over which we have no control.

Names I would like to bring before you Father, are Robbie and Sandy, Debra, Roland, Peggy, Glen, Lexi, the Shoemakers, the Wagnon’s, Donna and Eddie, Bubba and Dorothy, Our Elders, Bo, Shirley, Bill and Jane, Harold and Linda, Mike and Liz, David, Kim and Darla’s family, Judy Foster, Blanch Rieck, Flossie Fritsch, Mark Goode, Lisa Mahan, Bubba Rouse, Lucy and Daniel, James Spears, Alma, Laura Gomez, Carol Fabian and Eddie Bridwell, Staci Bailey, Stan and Nancy Dolecki, Mark and Janet. Bonnie’s mom, Sonny Goode, Candis Newton. The list is long Father but I think it’s important to list the names even though You know them these are the ones that came on my heart today so look down and bless their lives Father give what only You can give…Peace.

It is in the name of the savior Jesus Christ that I pray all these things into Your hands for deliberation and love. Be with us Father and do not let harm come our way for it is in You we are safe. Amen

Make this Life worth Living........

Dear Father

Everyday I want to make some time to pray because in Your will there is power and in You there is a way to live that will make this life worth living. I can only test those waters with prayer so setting aside this time for You I come to worship, to pray to be still which is never easy for me to do. A million things run threw my mind and I think it’s more important to take this time in prayer than to go about any other thing I might do so Father bless these prayers and keep me focused on you while I think over my day and restore my faith in this life.

I am blessed to have gotten news that Roland’s job is secure and that no one in his department was laid off. Thank you Lord for our financial security. It is a blessing to know we can now move forward with Debra’s needs as well as some of my own. Medical and dental appointments will be planned out and we are grateful for the funds to pay for these needs as they arise. It’s is so good to know that You provide for us and make sure our needs are met. I would like for things to go faster and be under my choice more but Father I know Your will and timing are the right things for us and I will go in prayer for Your guidance in all matters of concern. Be with Debra and help her to be accepting of this as well. Sometimes Father it’s a real test for me to deal with her and the attitudes she displays in matters that are of deep concern. It’s not easy to know what to do when dealing with her and I do get so angry with her and some of her comments. Father, let me be the adult figure here and keep me calmer in dealing with her. She says I take the things she says wrong and maybe I really do. I know she seeks to get better and get back in the game of life and I sometimes think keeping her under wraps is better because it feels better to know she is safe under this roof in our home. Out in the world it might be a much different story for us to deal with. Lord, I ask that you let me see both sides of this matter and don’t let me think controlling is always the best way to go. Each of us has a job to do in this life that is unto Your will so whatever should be let it be. Give me comfort in accepting that. There are some things I just can’t do Father so when I can’t do them I just can’t. My hands are tided when it comes to some things and some thoughts so I give it to You and I trust in You to make the way right for us. Carve a new depth in my heart so I can become a little less Pollyanna-ish and a little less naïve about being invincible and in control. Let me become a person who is a lot more attuned to others people’s pain and troubles. Manifest in me a tender heart and give me better knowledge of how to deal with people.

Father, walk with the troubles that are in the lives of some of our friends, be with Glen and Peggy. Be with the elders of our church, the Wagnon’s and Miss Merle. Touch the hearts of those who are bitter about matters they can’t control. Give the financial security to those who are in need of it. Keep our temper tantrums in check and our rambunctious fireballs in line. Help us all to walk the thin line that we must to do Your will and not our own.
Everybody is looking for a better way to deal with matters of this life so let them look to You. Keep Darla and Amber safe and working together for the good of that family, be with the Hart’s, and the service men of our country, be with Mark Goode, watch over him Father and bring him home safe. There is no substitute for Your plans in our lives Father so as I pray let me hear my prayers as well and honor what I ask of You myself so I help and not hinder the will You have for me.

It is in the blessed name of Your son Jesus that I pray until You come or call us home Father I lay every need and every care at Your feet because in You there is always hope. A better day is dawning and because of Your love we will see that day….Amen

Only God can Know if it's right or wrong.......

Dear Heavenly Father

Each and everyday is a test to stay devoted to You and I try to take time each morning to spend it with You in prayer so I can face the days work with You at my side. Father, thank You for a secure place in a crazy world. You bless our moments here with the shadow of hope, the treasured gift of friends and the ever present guidance of the Holy Spirit and I am thankful for it Father.

Father, today Roland will know if he’ll still have his job. We have gone threw this before and it puts such stress on him as he thinks he is responsible for so much. Let him know Father you are the controlling force in our lives and no matter if a job comes or goes we still walk in Your ways and find a path in this world. It’s not about a job or a place to live or a car it’s about staying focused on You and letting that be our strong hold. Place that in Roland’s heart today as he faces possible changes to his normal routine.

Last night Father we gave Peggy Hemmingway our old truck to drive while she is having some difficulty in her life. We can’t know if it was the right or the wrong thing to do but You laid that on our hearts Father and we pray the situation into Your hands. It would be nice to know what results your actions have before you do them but that’s not the case. We are trusting in You to help Peggy make the right choices, hold her steady and give her mind the ability to focus. Father, I fear that life’s pressures may cloud her judgments and make it difficult to make the right choices so guide her and do not let the burdens conquer. We can not know the whole truth in this matter and sometimes and effort to help can hurt. Please Father I beg that is not the case for we are praying also for Glen and his health issues, for him to recover this difficult and devastating problem with his health. It is not for us to take sides in any matter only to offer help where we can to ease the burdens. A marriage is a difficult place when there are problems with money and health. Give them rest Father and watch over all of them while they face this. Be with little Lexi and make a way for her Father as I know she sees all the fighting and the bitterness. Protect her and keep her safe. Keep her where she needs to be for whatever is best for her.

Father please watch over the Wagon’s, the problems they face with travel, health matters, and heartaches. It is never easy to watch as members of our families suffer. Be with Pam’s mother give her strength and rest.

Each day I ask You with great need to watch the eldership at our church. Be with the choices that are made the men that make them and the people that it affects. Give them guidance, hope and support in all matters that they must deal with. We are so thankful Father that they have accepted the task, have the qualities that are needed and will do it. Fewer and fewer people are willing to take that on and to do it for year after year. It’s a heavy burden to their families and their marriages so support their work and give them clear vision to know Your will. Father, also work with the mindset of our congregation so they will pull together and fight for our church to grow. Let us support these men so the work is not all on them but spread out among many so they don’t get weighed down and worn down. Keep them, claim them in the name of Jesus to remain steadfast for Your work and cause. Let nothing stand in the way of progress for this eldership.

Father, thank you for the recovery of Sue Pratt, Joy Avery that was a much needed blessing and these ladies are very happy to be up and walking again and in Your service. Thank you for helping them get better and back to a more normal life style.

Father, be with Debra today as we start a new medication and with it maybe she will be able to go back out in public without fear of falling. Let this give her some relief and let it also make her testing be more effective in the future testing she has to face. Hold us all up as we try to find an answer to the troubles that she has. Let the finances be available to pay for these medical bills that come upon us with no insurance to help with them just make a way for us to continue to do the best we can in that area.

The prayers will never stop and the request will never stop Father I ask in the name of Jesus everyday because he dies for me and gave me this way so I honor it in prayers because with You all things are possible. In the name of Jesus I claim that hope by these prayers and I lay it all at the foot of the cross for Your consideration. Amen

Our Deepest Fear

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

----from A Return to Love, by Marianne Williamson

Sometimes you get little hints along the way that it's not the time to stand down. It's not the time to rest. I don't really know why but all along life has shown me keep putting one foot in front of the other. No matter what just keep moving forward. Never look back. Forgetting the past and moving on is one of the best blessing in this life. For a long time I prayed on this blog but stopped or marked them private but someone said do what you did in the beginning. Well now doesn't that make sense? It was working great. Why did you stop? I think prayer not only bonds our hearts to God's will but seals our own minds as to what we should do and hope for. God isn't the only one who hears our prayers we hear them, too. Our deepest needs are opened in prayers, our hopes are brought to the surface, our dreams are laid out in detail. We pray it and the Holy Spirit can help us have the strength to move on it, guide it and make it possible. What hold us back is us. So today I am going back to the start. I am going to start praying here because it takes some time it gives me a place to reflect and it holds me accountable to do it. Short prayers, oral prayers, all good as well but here I dig in deep, sit still and stay calm. It's really hard for me to sit still, to focus, to not let my mind wonder to different subjects. So lets get started today Jan, 18, 2010 at 9:30 a.m.

Dear Heavenly Father

My Master, Leader and King I am here to worship, to start a life a prayer, to bow down, to lay all that I have at Your feet. I know that there are times when the unspeakable will happen the heartaches will come and the down falls of depression will mask the glory that You want for all your children. When it seems a bit dim I am thankful that the cloud do part and the sun does shine again for those who just keep loving You. I have very little understanding of the word "why". I see pain most everyday in things I have no ability to change, or even deal with rationally. I take a deep breath and slow down but it doesn't change the heartaches. Only in You can I make any reason out of it. I understand this is a walk a journey back to You and I have to cling everyday to that thought. I had to realize that even in the Church there lies a danger when we take our eyes off of you to see the problems that surround us. Father, keep my eyes on You and Your will for my life. I can be so easily distracted. Programs and projects all have a place but it is You and Your will that should hold us firm in everyday of our life. Not what we are doing, or what we are about doing. Those things shall all pass away, in a heartbeat anything that a man's hands have done can be snapped away without a second thought, a storm, a car wreck, a fire. We are weak vessels with limited ability but You calm our hearts and let us know that in You there is still hope no matter what happens and dark days will not rule us. Our work here is for hope, to spread it to share it and to live in it. Blessed be the provider of that hope, those who can stay on task when it's hard, when it's not easy and those who hold the life line out to others when they fall away.

Each and everyday there is a list of concerns, Father my name falls to that list. I have petty concerns that have kept me in a state of limbo. Clear my head Father I know my task here. I know my work let me go about doing it Father without concern. You have given to me a strong heart, a passion for others and a caring will do not let me hold those at bay when I could be helping someone in need just because I am not so sure of myself. Others that need You and Your watch are Aubree and Ayden Fall for respiratory problems, Mark Goode as he serves our country, Blanch Rieck and Flossie Fritsch as old age befalls them and the problems that go with that. Be with our expecting mothers, our young parents, those that tend to the sick. Watch over Glen and Peggy, Lexi and those involved with them at this time. Soften the heartaches for them and let a more positive outcome come into their lives. Be with Glen's surgeries and keep Peggy strong for her husband and be with their marriage. Be with Judy Foster and the needs she has. Keep us all in the body of Christ under Your watch and care.

A deeper request goes for our elders and their wives. The task they have is overwhelming. They are only men and in such making choices men might make so give them answers Father for they pray these matters of the church into Your hands. They are gifted men and among our choice as a church. We have as a body said these men were the best to represent us, we chose them to be our foundation so help them to help us. Give them the bold voice they need to lead, let them not grow weary with dealing with our slowness to respond to a new path. Keep them strong in faith and spirit and bless the work they do. It is never easy to deal with the problems that face a church so give them extra concern for their thoughts and needs that affect all of the body. These men and their wives: David Ellis, Kim Ellis, Harold and Linda Allen, Bo and Shirley Cox, Bill and Jane Hana, Mike and Liz Miller they have committed to watch after my soul to be my guide and to keep me in Your light. So with that task of me and the many others that's lives they touch please let them press on to the goal with Your backing and Your support for the things that they do whether good or bad it affects many souls that are in Your attendance and should be kept in Your attendance. The job is not easy so always an extra portion for the work that is at hand for these men. Also Father guide them to find a Youth Minister that is worthy to lead. Give us a person who will guide us and not let harm come to the youth of our church. We ask boldly in the name of Jesus for a name who is a cut above the rest to give some foundation that is much needed at this time. Trust worthy and strong to rebuild our youth group.

Lord, I ask that you watch over matters and concerns with Darla,
Steven, Amber and Big Mike. Let the problems be resolved, help Amber find work and let school be a refreshing experience for Micheal. Give them everything needed to be on solid ground. Help them to not be stressed with each other, help them to be kind and focused on the needs they have to be a better and stronger family unit. All of us Lord need Your watch as we help our children and grandchildren find a firm foundation in life.

Father, Roland and I are stepping out of our comfort zone to help someone. It could be a very productive thing but then again it could cause harm. You can never really know what results your actions will have so bless our efforts and keep those who are in harms way safe. Let us do the right thing and choose the right motives. Work hand in hand with us Father because only you can see and know the hearts of those involved. We can only do what you lay upon our hearts to do and we hope we can do it without reservation or fear.

We pray it all into the working knowlege You have for us. Keep us safe, Father for it is in the Glory of Your son's name that we pray. To the victory that is in Chirst Jesus for the love of all mankind. Amen 10:33 a.m.